Tuesday, June 30, 2009

MORE Reasons my Dad rules

So I was all happy about my refund check coming in, yeah? The thing was that it got mailed to Dad's in south Texas (which wasn't to ME in Oklahoma...) and he doesn't have a Bank of America in his little town, so you know what he did? My Awesome Dad drove an hour to a bigger city and deposited my check for me so it would get to me faster.

My dad rules. (Love you, Dad!!)

Fireworks and Vacation time!

So I'm getting pretty excited for this lovely holiday weekend. As if you didn't know, I'm going to Albuquerque for a few days! And, as has been previously stated, vacations are wonderful.

Actually, this is the first of a couple of these trips this month, but this one is different for a couple of reasons. First, it was relatively unplanned. I have a co-worker whose boyfriend lives in Albuquerque (total coincidence) and so she goes out there about twice a month. She is cool as SHIT and we're going to have a total blast on the 8 hour car drive (and in her Scion, which gets MUCH better gas mileage than my Explorer). Second, this one will have FIREWORKS!!! (Well, I guess they'll both have fireworks, heh heh... ahem..)


Fireworks are so much the best thing and fun and wonderful and happiness and smushy and preeety.... *sigh*

I love fireworks.


Oh! I also love this song!! I heard it in the trailer for "Away We Go" and I can't stop listening to it:

All of My Days - Alexi Murdoch


pic here

Monday, June 29, 2009


Hey! I'm back from the abyss that was Friday's workday. It was a terrifying journey but I made it back alive.

Ok, so there are a few movies that I am REALLY wanting to see this summer. Here are the two I am most excited about:

Away We Go

(500) Days of Summer

Also: MY IRS CHECK CAME IN FINALLY!!! Just in time for my 4th of July trip, too! Well, I have more actual work to do today, so blech. I'll blog later, promise. :)

Friday, June 26, 2009

A message...

[push play before reading entry]


NO! Don't look at me! Act like you're refilling your coffee. I don't have much time...

*Looks around*

There is an order. A large one. It is already in the office and it will likely take all of my morning, so this is the last we'll speak for quite some time. Continue to investigate every corner of the internet until I return. If I'm not back by Sunday, don't come looking. It will be too late.

*doors opening, noises in hallway*

They're here! Quickly, I must appear to be working... OH! One last thing before I go: be sure and find whichever dumbass McDonald's employee forgot to include my damn hashbrowns. That's my favorite part of the whole frickin' breakfast. I was really looking forward to that this morning, too. That employee: they need to disappear. Make it happen.

Good luck, readers.

This blog will self-destruct in 5.....






Thursday, June 25, 2009

Sending up a prayer to the IRS Gods

This is me pleading with the Gods that have the power to send me my refund check:

    I'm begging you here... I'd really like to pay bills and put gas in my car and generally live without the pressing knowledge that I REALLY need to be paying various entities back money.

*end begging*

So to balance the groveling, here is a smushy song:

The Question - Old 97's

ihtf fo fweet.

...I apologize for that.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Roll me away

In the continuing saga of purse/car/apartment change, I stopped by the bank at lunch to be informed that they (unlike the bank back home where I worked) virtually require change to be rolled for them to take it. Otherwise they have to send it off...?

I have no idea.

I'll let you guess what I was doing after lunch today:

And a little GPOYW (Gratuitous Picture of Yourself Wednesday) for ya, too


All rolled up.

So I'm going through the drive-thru to get real dollars after work. Yippee!

Musically sheltered

When I was growing up, my mother sheltered me, musically. I could probably say that she stifled me, somewhat, but she didn't do it on purpose. She just didn't like any music besides country, so whenever I was with her (which was basically all the time) that's all we listened to. As an anecdote to illustrate my point, I remember being in either jr. high or early high school and being all "Man! Dad, Mom said you like The Beatles? (as if The Beatles were a new and cool thing that virtually no one knew about) They're really neat sounding!" I'm pretty sure Dad just sighed resignedly and let it go. (Fun fact: The first Beatles song I really remember was "Free as a Bird")

Because of all of this, I am actually quite a fan of pre-pop country. As in, country when there was still a twang (I am from Texas, after all), but not so much that it was grating. Y'all, it was 80s/90s Country, and it was sooo good. To name a few:

    Garth Brooks
    Reba McEntire
    George Strait
    Brooks & Dunn
    Vince Gil
    Diamond Rio
    Trisha Yearwood
    John Michael Montgomery
    Martina McBride
    Faith Hill
    Tim McGraw
    Kathy Mattea
    Toby Keith
    Deana Carter
    Trace Adkins
    Terri Clark
    The Judds
    Chely Wright
    Sara Evans
    The Dixie Chicks....

I could probably go on. (Ok, fine. That was way more than "a few") I also recognize that some of these are really pushing the pop country line, but I don't care. They are sooooooo good (reiterated and with more o's). Anywho, here's your little bloggy dose of 90s country:

I Cross My Heart - George Strait
This always reminds me of gymnasium dances in jr. high. *swoon*

Safe in the Arms of Love - Martina McBride
Not one of her biggest hits, but I wanted something upbeat and... really none of the really good girl songs are upbeat...

Shameless - Garth Brooks
ZOMG. best. My internet searches for random info on Mr. Brooks yielded rumors of a tour with Trisha Yearwood and/or Reba McEntire as openers. YES, PLEASE. I'd pay to see that shit, for sure.

In other news, I think I have discovered the secret to being able to wake up in the morning. I usually... like every morning (read: 11:30am)... will lay in bed and just in general not want to get up for probably an hour depending on when I have set my alarms (all 4 of them) and which one actually wakes me up. But I also usually... like pretty much every night... right before I go to bed, I'll eat something. I'm not talking a little something, either. I mean like a plateful (or 2) of pasta. I accidentally didn't do that earlier this week and ended up waking up at 6 in the morning. Go figure. So I also didn't eat a ton of carbs right before bed last night, and I was able to coherently wake up at 6:45 and remember that I had to be at work at 8. I think I will continue with this. It worked surprisingly well.

Lastly, www.whothetweet.com CONSUMED my morning in a ball of flames. Amusingly accurate and somewhat revealing flames.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

"Let me get that for you..."

(via le love)

le love


To clarify, Sassy Ginger, this is "sexy" (potentially because I'm "concupiscent" {look that shit up. trust me.}) as opposed to "smushy" so it's ok to post.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Change will do you good

So, it's been a morning. Like, an actual full on morning. I woke up at 6am (I have no idea why) and went to Walmart to buy groceries. New low: I had to actually put back some RAMEN (of all of the random foodstuffs) to ensure my ability to purchase with the amount of dollars I had. Sad? A little. It will be a funny story later in life... like one I tell my kids about how they need to go to college so they can get jobs and not live their lives putting back Ramen out of frickin' necessity.

So now I am at work, and there is the usual amount of work to be done (read: I am reading blogs, Gchatting and listening to music. Tough life.) and what am I doing? I brought a bucket of change in from my apartment, my car, and my purse so I can perhaps scrounge up enough money to put some more gas in my car (Thank GOD my work(s) and my apartment are close to each other) and maybe... well, no. Probably not a whole lot else.

I'm kind of afraid every time my boss comes in that he's going to make a joke about being at the end of my cash or something... 'cause then I'll feel bad. I also kind of don't want it to seem like I'm just rolling in dough here. Also: I can't decide if this is the best or worst time to bring up those extra hours he was going to see about getting me a couple of weeks ago...

I am going to chronicle this event for your amusement.

Me: Hey! There are a lot more quarters here than I originally thought. Yay!!

Full separation.

Sidenote: I have a special affection for dimes. I have no idea why.

Almost done!
and the desk is happy! Look!

Grand Total: $24.78 (Otherwise known as almost DOUBLE what I got for hocking some DVDs this morning...)


Sunday, June 21, 2009

It's Father's Day!!!

...and I don't get to go see my dad, which is kind of crappy. We may use the wonders of technology and video chat or something later, but actually, I'll probably call him and tell him "Happy Father's Day!" and that will be it. I think that'll be fine, though, and he should be rolling through OKC on his way back from somewhere else in the relatively near future, so we're all good.

My dad is the best kind of dad I could have ever asked for. He was (in my little kid mind) mean and deserving of my fear when I was doing crap I wasn't supposed to be doing (Hell, now, too), but that's the way it's supposed to be. He also tempered being mean (which wasn't really mean, it was just him being a parent and disciplining his child when she was being a brat, which I very much appreciate NOW) with much love and stories told by my stuffed animals about Barfy the Beaver (played by a bear that was a hand puppet) that barfed when he ate Dogwood trees, but not when he ate Birdwood trees (no, those do not exist). It actually may have been the other way around, but none of us, Seester included, remember.

I'm on the left, and my sister is on the right

Haha, this is after the opera at OCU (He looks goofy! Love you, Dad!)

All of us in Arkansas visiting grandparents

So, here's to you, Dad!
I love you and Happy Father's Day!!

My bestest friend

So, I may have cried a little this morning when Kate and Andrew left. She called me earlier this evening and told me that they were on their way back from a wedding, so they detoured through OKC to have breakfast/coffee/pit stop.

She and I have been BFFs (hahaha) since I was a sophomore and she was a freshman in high school. We were both in band and in choir and there was just one day at an after school rehearsal that I just decided that we were going to be friends. Apparently, that was all I had to do, because she was pretty quiet and, (obviously) I am the opposite of quiet, so it worked out. We sang together with her mother at, of all things, a cafeteria workers end of the year banquet. We sang "I'll Fly Away" but with the words "I'll Walk in May" and another song with new words that I don't remember, and this:

Tonight - Patience and Prudence

I was a bitch in high school. I can admit it. I can own up to it. And Kate was my best friend through all of it; my only true friend, really. I had other good friends, but Kate is the one I can call at any time ever ever, even if we haven't talked in months, and we'll talk for 2 hours catching up (we have done this). She and her fiancé (who is GREAT, by the way) and I just sat at IHOP for an hour talking about wedding stuff and boy stuff and just stuff stuff and man, I need to go see them. Maybe I'll get to make a trip of it, though I'm kind of running out of summer. In any case, she's one of those life friends that will be around for the duration.

Valentine's Day (we were hot stuff)

Prom (so classy)

Kate and Andrew (SO cute!)

I can't WAIT for your wedding!

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Little lights

There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.

-Edith Wharton


Friday, June 19, 2009

A Perfect Life

(In the midst of a conversation about mountains, ocean and big skies)

    Him: Why can't I have it all?
    Me: Nobody can ever have it all.
    Me: You can continually strive for "it all" but if you could really attain perfection... what after that? There will always be something else. This isn't a bad thing.
    Him: Bullshit. A perfect life can be had.
    Him: It is finding what you love, finding a way to get paid doing it, and doing it in a place and with/around people you love.


Well, yes. That would be pretty close to perfect, huh?

Ansel Adams, Golden Gate Headlands, 1950

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Feelin' smushy


“Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over.”

- Author Unknown

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

One of those damn days

I feel SO whiney today. Everylittlething that happens is just irritating the CRAP out of me.


When I come into work, if there are messages on the phone, when you pick up the phone you hear *blip, blip, blip, blip* instead of the usual dial tone. There are never more than, like, 2 messages, but that *blip, blip* noise just makes me NUTS!

This is not world ending, it is just annoying. But it's also pretty much the only thing I actually DO at work: returning calls and fixing their little problems.

Ok, this needs a list-

How you can be certain that today sucks:

  • Messages on the phone so there's that noise...

  • The bandaid on my thumb keeps falling off. This is driving me crazy. (I gave myself what amounted to a mutant papercut... but I did it with a knife, so I guess that makes it a knife wound. Whatever. It was all for the rainbowcake.)

  • I have no money to speak of, so I am checking my mailbox twice a day for my IRS refund check. Dad paid for my taxes to get filed, but my sister messed it up, so we had to file a correction or something, and it's taking FOREVER.

  • The absence of the refund thing is seriously disappointing about twice a day, but it's almost as bad to have nothing in the mailbox at all, which is also usually the case.

  • My fat pants fit. :'-(

  • I have to sit at my work work (the office job) for the afternoon and then immediately go to Victoria's Secret (which is much harder work, actually) and stay until who knows when because since Semi-Annual Sale started yesterday, the place is going to be a wreck.

  • There is no drinking water at work. I even brought a little snack. What did I bring? Salty chips. I forgot water, so no snack and I'm thirsty.

  • Back to the no money thing, I have been subsisting on pasta for a while. On the surface, this looks like a great idea, as pasta is arguably my favorite food ever. This morning, I literally didn't want to eat pasta at all, ever. This is distressing.

Uugh. I have pictures to post of Rainbowcake (which was a great success, by the way), but I don't feel like it.

I am in such a funk!! I'm sorry, guys, but that's all I have for you today: a buttload of whining. This is one of those days that I want to just get through it, then go home and sit with the boy until I go to sleep (Won't get that either. That's a looong drive...)

Anyway, I'll give you a song that sounds like how my day feels. I didn't even look at the lyrics, I'm talking about the sound of it.

Everblue - Mandy Moore

Monday, June 15, 2009


OK, my Alyssa Friend and I are going to make RAINBOWCAKE this evening and I am WHOA excited. Pictures forthcoming...

New music and my beef with bloggy photos

As tends to happen, Joel said I ought to listen to a band called Parachute because I would like it and... I did. (They sound like a more palatable Gavin Degraw, but anyhow). The video for "She is Love" is VERY cute (watch here), but I prefer the acoustic version on the album. So here's today's pretty picture and song post!

She Is Love - Parachute

two paths
I think this is pretty!
But it does contain obviously "bloggy" elements: tree, sky, blurred edges, birds

On an unrelated issue: why are balloons such a popular item in bloggy photos here lately (Exhibits A, B, and C?) I am not gonna lie, I like bloggy photos (you know, the ones that are arty and original and blurred on the edges with the saturation down and the focus on one specific and usually ironic thing?) and I have even posted arty photos, because they are bloggy. And arty. Anyhow.
There is just some typical subject matter in bloggy photos (flowers, sky, trees, lens flares, birds, skinny girls with flawless skin, disheveled hair and billowy short dresses), I just was mildly curious how balloons got into the mix. And typewriters? And cameras.
It's also funny to me how formulaic some bloggy photos are. I can make a bloggy photo in about 3 steps: reduce saturation, up contrast, add blurred edges/vignette. Ready? Here it is:

This is actually a photo from a college with a degree in landscape design. Truth be told, it was hard to find a landscape photo that wasn't already bloggy.

Blogified. Caption possibilities:
"My heart is here..."
"silence breaks me"

(Create your own!)

Well, this was longer than I expected it to be... (THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!)

Ok, enough harping on the bloggy world. As is obvious, I like 'em, too, but that doesn't make them any less predictable. :)

photo here

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Favorite: On Movies

So, among the cheapest and most worthwhile ways to use up a couple of hours with someone is watching a movie, right? That is a little harder to do when the person you want to watch a movie with is a time zone away. All I can say is that it can be done, though it's best when you both have the same cell phone provider (Thank God for the IN Network). Oh, and that Redbox is fantastic. Nothing like standing in front of your respective Redboxes (in different states) on your cell phones trying to decide what movie(s) to watch. Technology is a wonderful, wonderful thing.


Pictures and such

I have recently started following a ton of blogs that I simply have in a category of "Pretties" in my Google Reader. They are just exactly that: blogs that post pretty pictures and quotes and whatnot. I found them through either other people's blogs or actually from other pretty picture blogs, as they like to reference each other with some frequency.

I put these links (for whatever reason) in a draft blog and I forgot what they were, so I thought for today I'd just post them, no matter what they were. Let's see!

via so much love

via The Many Faces of Zooey Deschanel

via i can read

“I heard what you said. I’m not the silly romantic you think. I don’t want the heavens or the shooting stars. I don’t want gemstones or gold. I have those things already. I want… a steady hand. A kind soul. I want to fall asleep, and wake, knowing my heart is safe. I want to love, and be loved.”
- Shana Abé

via restart my heart

via restart my heart

via paper tissue

via so much love

F*ck Yeah! Ryan Gosling

This seems to be like LOLcats for pictures of Ryan Gosling... I felt the need to immediately post this:


via ....erm... here.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

This is great!

So I'm going to do a short post today, because I feel like the rest of my day is too busy with sales training at Victoria's Secret (woo woo!) and paying my electric bill in the 30 minute break between THIS work and sales training to think about anything but playing on Gchat and eating my pasta I brought in for brunch (? {it's 10am. I don't know what kind of weird mealtime this is}). Anywho, I think this song is so catchy (not like Poker Face catchy, which, thanks to LiLu, I can NOT stop listening to {not sure if this is a good thing}), that I wanted to share. Also, isn't she so frickin' gorgeous? She seems to me to be one of those girls you would want to be friends with. Lots of famous people don't have that appeal, but she sure does.



Can we be friends, please?

She is the "She" portion of She & Him. Here's that catchy song I told you about:

I Thought I Saw Your Face Today - She & Him

Tuesday, June 9, 2009


(I guess that could be pronounced "day-AH-muh-ter" or "DAY-oh-ME-ter")

I just had a brilliant idea:

The Dayometer

I want one so bad. Hm... I should probably explain what it is. Ok, so it would be (as it's not even invented yet) an "-ometer" that tells the blog-o-whatever how your day is! I mean...

oh. I guess we have Twitter for that. Damn it.

I was actually kind of excited about this, but now, literally over the course of writing this post, I have realized that it is just not really a very worthwhile endeavor.

Let it be known that I had it all worked out... how it could have a needle like most "-ometers" and it would have labels like "Kickass day!" all the way on one side and "Shitty day" on the other side and emoticons for some of them and possibly indicator lights about WHY the Dayometer was where it was (like a "Check Food Intake" light on a :( day)...

...it's possible I put too much thought into things sometimes.

HOWEVER: My Dayometer just moved toward the "Kickass!" side by an amount of NOMs because my totally kickass amazing Rümmi brought me food at work!

I heart her :)

Gchat Fail.

Ok, I feel like one of two things right now (perhaps both):

1) One of those old people that pushes the buttons on their phone with one finger.


2) One of those needy people on social networking pages that is all, "Plz leave comments on my page so I feel looved!" (even though this is about Gchat and not about comments)

I don't know how to work Gchat, and being the most technologically savvy person in my immediate social circle, I have no guidance and I sort of feel like I'm missing out on some fun internet thing (even though it's basically just AIM).

Still, if there are any Gchat Veterans (I'm sort of looking in your direction, GingerMandy or potentially LiLu) that would be willing to take me under their wing, I would be forever thankful (or at least until the next internet thing comes along...)

Monday, June 8, 2009

Hey Dear...

Hey Dear,
you know I hate to go.
Just lay here
listening to the radio.
hiding from the world below.
The day fading on the dial.

Receiver - Hem


photo via Flickr here

The year 3000

Conan = brilliant.

(Quick link courtesy of Seester:)

This will undoubtedly happen.

Friday, June 5, 2009

I chose music.

- - This post is forever long; fair warning for you there. But it's one of the most defining parts of my life thus far, so... why wouldn't it be a long post, you know? - -

I have never actually written down an account of what happened to make me decide to go to grad school. I haven't for various reasons, but I feel like it all happened long enough ago that I can talk about it now.

To be quite honest, I had just planned to get married right out of college, move away from my little hometown and pop out some babies. The truth is that I really only went to grad school because I didn't have any other plans, and without any plans, it just seemed like the next logical thing to do.

Let me back up.

Ok... confession:

This isn't really the story of why I went to grad school. This is the story of why I didn't get married. They just happen to be the same story.

I met the man who was to become my ex-fiancé my freshman year in college. Our relationship appropriately started with him meeting my dad, shaking his hand and introducing himself. We were speaking at the high school where my dad taught, but in that moment, it felt like a first date, and it pretty much went from there. I barely knew him and he barely knew me, but that ended up being really beneficial for the longevity of the relationship. What I knew of him was that he was everything I thought I wanted in a husband: tall, Southern, conservative, Baptist, man's man kind of guy. He was also from a big family that I fell in love with upon first meeting. What he knew of me was that I was attracted to him. What he didn't know was that I was so glad to have found what I thought I wanted, that I would pretty much be whatever he wanted me to be to keep it. Tragically, I think that at the time, that's what I thought was supposed to happen.

Over the course of three years, he molded me into exactly what he wanted me to be: a quiet, submissive, nice, sweet, prim and proper woman. If you know nothing of me, let me let you know that I am loud, mean, cynical and have been known to curse like a sailor on occasion. Those three years of my life were so unlike my actual personality, that Seester once said, "You were not you during that time. I kind of liked you better, but you weren't you." (I have yet to understand the full implications of THAT statement, but I digress) I may tell some of the "wife-grooming" stories later. They're pretty interesting on their own.

Please hear me when I say that the whole stripping of my actual personality from me wasn't malicious on his part. And actually, it turned out to be vital in the figuring myself out process, as giving up everything about what made me me helped me to find out just what that was.

So from the tail end of my freshman year right up until I graduated, he and I were dating. We were dating and visiting his family and talking about getting married and how wonderful our little small town life would be. This wonderful life where he would go to work and I would stay home and clean the house and take care of the kiddies and all that. And it made me happy. It really did.

However, every one of the four years of my undergrad, I was also heavily involved in the opera in the spring. It was crazy. For the entirety of the fall, I was completely content with the housewife/mommy life that was ahead of me. But without fail, spring would roll around and that meant opera season. I would get so immersed in learning the music and staging and everything the production entailed, and a part of me would say, "You want to do this. You can do this." I just told that part of me to shut up and that I would be perfectly content and happy being a mommy and a stay at home housewife.

Let me pause briefly to say that the actual mommy/housewife life was NOT, I repeat, NOT the problem. I would still enjoy that, I'm sure, just as I would have then. The difference is that he thought opera was immoral or... well, actually, there's no telling what he really thought about it because, as he later showed me (and just in time, too), he would say anything to get what he wanted. He wanted me to be a stay at home housewife/mommy and wanted me to do so to the exclusion of anything else, probably because that is what a woman "should" do. Again, don't even get me started on gender roles and what is "appropriate" for a woman, because I'm actually kind of backward. I grew up in a conservative household and I still hold to most of those beliefs, so it's not some sort of feminist empowerment kick that made me resent his assignment of me to the role of housewife, either. It was his presumption that he knew what was best for me, and my erringly allowing him to exercise that control over me. I apologize, I'm rambling... back to the tale at hand.

I'll save the "How I Got Engaged, and Why It Still Sort of Irritates Me" story for another time, but suffice to say that we got engaged over Spring Break my senior year with plans to get married the following August (if you're counting, that's 5 months from engagement to wedding. Yikes). Then a funny thing happened: I learned how to sing. I know, I know... What the crap does that mean? It means that I subconsciously knew that I wouldn't have been able to really succeed the way I wanted to singing the way I had before Saturday, May 6, 2006 (totally crazy that I know the date, huh? Perhaps yet another story for another time). It also meant that until that time, I really had no concrete arguments against my assignment to housewife (arguments for myself, really). In any case, after the performance the next day, my voice teacher that I had been studying with for 7 years by that time came up to me and said, "Well, you finally learned how to sing!" So what did I do? I called the man (since he hadn't come into town to see me sing. Not bitter).

Me: I want to sing opera professionally.

Then-Fiancé: Well, you've never wanted to do that before!

Me (In my head): What the heck? Where have you BEEN the last three years? Remember all those times that I was all "Maybe I want to do opera... no, just kidding. I want to live in a tiny town and have a lot of babies."? Yeah, me neither...

Me (out loud): I just want to try it. And if I fall on my face, at least I will have tried and then I can get it out of my brain.

Then-Fiancé: Well, I hate to tell you this, but you'd never make it anyway.

Me: [...shocked silence...] I must have made some sort of disbelieving noise at this point, but it wasn't words

Then-Fiancé: Oh! No no, not talent-wise. You're just too lazy.

I think it was at that moment that I knew that it was never going to work with him. He was, and still is to this day, literally the only person in my entire life that has not endorsed the idea of me pursuing this singing thing. There was no way in hell I was going to marry the person in my life with that particular distinction. So I took a drive and gave him back the ring and ended it. We haven't spoken in several years (I am not really a person who stays friends with my exes, as a rule). He married about a year later and I wish him well. (Seriously. Why not? He didn't do anything but push me to do what I do now.)

The End

Just kidding. There is one other little thing. About a month after I ended it, I wasn't dating anyone (obviously) and was all lonely and sad (even though I did the breaking. It's still not fun, you know?) and so I started wearing the gold band that was originally intended to be his wedding ring. I know, it's a little (read: whoa...) weird. But I had already bought it and pawning it wasn't even close to worth it, so in the creepy and moderately pathetic haze that was that summer, I wore it on my thumb.

Then something snapped a little. It wasn't a big dramatic thing, but one day I just looked at that ring and all it represented with a sense of empowerment (and a healthy amount of cynicism) and reclaimed it. How? I had it engraved. I still wear it pretty much every day as sort of a memorial to that life and a constant reminder of the decisions I made that have brought me to where I am.
Wanna know what it says? Of course you do. It says:

I chose music.

**Edit: You know, after having re-read this just now, I realize that I didn't actually state what the biggest problem was. I have since discovered, through much hashing with best friends and living through other failed relationships, that the reason it wouldn't have worked was NOT because he didn't support my decision to pursue opera (though that certainly didn't help) or anything related to opera at all. It was a much, much bigger issue than that. He couldn't talk about anything. If he had a problem with something, opera for example, he really didn't know how to just say, "You know, for whatever reason, I don't like the idea of you pursuing this. Let's talk about it." After examining much of the rest of our relationship, it was truly this wonky aspect of the whole thing that broke the coffin. Or put the nail in the camel's back. Or something. Just to clarify a bit what was already a very long, slightly rambly and ranty tale.

Big ol' bunch of music

When I checked my Twitter this morning and I see a very (very very very) sweet tweet (hahahaha) from Pop and Ice. In response to said sweetness, I hereby dedicate this big ol' bunch of music to her. I hope you (and anyone else who reads this) will enjoy!

So, I narrowed the selection to ten, and I'm going to group them in twos that are sort of similar. (This is mainly for my own personal benefit, as things tend to get jumbled when they rattle around in my brain without any semblance of order.)

Sidenote: I am totally breaking my own "Don't post ridiculously long blog entries" rule, but I really only write this thing for my own amusement anyhow, so I'll break it today.

Group 1: Random (Pfft. I would start with a "random" group.)

These are songs that actually just didn't go with any of the other groups or with each other, but I like these songs quite a bit; "Seven Nights in Ireland" for its mood and "Amado Mio" because Pink Martini is genius and incredibly versatile.

Seven Nights in Ireland - Reckless Kelly

Amado Mio - Pink Martini

Group 2: Oren Lavie Genius Playlist

iTunes has this amazing "Genius Playlist" feature that will take a song you like and make a playlist of similar sounding songs you already have. These came off of such a playlist based on Oren Lavie's "Her Morning Elegance" (if you watch that, definitely watch it in HQ)

A Dream Within a Dream - Oren Lavie

Under the Weather - KT Tunstall

Group 3: Stuff that sounds vaguely like "Boy With A Coin"

Since I have been obsessed with that song recently, there is logically a whole group that reminds me of it. The Ryan Adams is a cover of Oasis' "Wonderwall" which has sort of a weird video, but if you've never heard the original, the cover is less impressive.

Wonderwall - Ryan Adams

Mykonos - Fleet Foxes

Group 4: Hem and Gabe Dixon

Ahhhh... two of my very favorite and just gorgeous artists. The Hem song is a bonus track, so unless you've acquired everything they've ever done, PopandIce, I don't think you will have heard it. "Further the Sky" has some superb lyrics:

The higher you reach,
The further the sky.
The more miles you walk,
The longer the road.
The steeper you climb,
The harder you stand to fall.
The stronger you get,
The heavier the load.

In a Barrel At Sea - Hem

Further the Sky - The Gabe Dixon Band

Group 5: Not Your Typical Blog Music

Ok, I am an opera singer. I have been in and around choral music and a much more classical vein of song for quite some time. While I don't particularly enjoy all of it (or even a lot of it), sometimes I just love me some classical-er sounding stuff. The King's Singers are a group of 6 men that sing all kinds of stuff from Renaissance madrigals to The Beatles. And then.... *sigh* Ian. I have gone to school with Ian for the last two years and his voice is seriously one of my very favorite voices I have ever heard. That actually is quite a statement, because I am really picky and I have heard a lot of people, but *sigh* again. I could just go on and on about his voice and how frickin' pretty it is. That song is from Civil War by Frank Wildhorn and is a letter from a soldier to his wife (lyrics here). The quality on that one isn't so good because we were giving our little recital in what was basically a cafeteria, but you can still hear the dreaminess...

You Are the New Day - King's Singers

Sarah from Civil War - Ian Gibb


Dang it!

I really hate when I link to something in a post and I inadvertently leave out part of the address so it goofs up the hyperlink.

As in this post where I linked the word "bastert" to this piece of work, but I botched the link and it didn't do what it was supposed to.

I feel like this is an important enough link that I need to correct the oversight. It's "A Dramatic Reading of a Real Break Up Letter" and its audio is a little NSFW (it says the "s" word!) but it is whoa funny.

Also MANY THANKS to Pop and Ice for her sweet words and linkage! (I'll do a pretty music post just for you when I get to work here in a bit. Promise :) )

Thursday, June 4, 2009


I love it when I have known someone long enough to not only have inside jokes, but legitimate habits built on inside jokes. And I don't mean heavy-handed, obvious stuff. I'm talking the subtle and comforting goofiness when you know that a question is coming, so you look forward to it and laugh every time. Because it's funny. It's funny in its own right, but it's also funny that it still happens.


Do we start on 1, or after 1?

Dear Old Love

If you haven't heard of this site, you're really missing out. In their words:

"Dear Old Love" is short notes to people
we've loved (or at least liked).
Requited or unrequited.

The ex-husband in Grace Paley's short story
"Wants" says to his ex-wife,

"I attribute the dissolution of our marriage
to the fact that you never invited the Bertrams to dinner."

If you're bitter, that's the way
to express it here.

Actual folks submit these and they're posted anonymously.

They range from sweet and cute:
To Do
You say it would take “a lot” to get back together. Please be more specific so I can start working on that list.

Saving Face
I said I was pink-cheeked because I was hot. In fact, it was because you were.

to amusing:
No Tao
I’m not sure what to do with this giant stuffed Tigger you sent me, except perhaps dismember it and send you parts in the mail.

Bio Rhythm

I was attracted to you was because you looked like a more approachable, younger version of my super-hot biology teacher.

to heart-breaking:
No Consolation Prize
Telling me that I was the closest you’d ever gotten to marrying someone did not console me.

to kind of funny:
You Knew What I Meant
When I said we’d make no sense together, I meant we’d make an amazing couple.

So We're Even
I hate that I love you. I love that I hate you.

to nerdy:
My love for you is like pi—irrational, never-ending…

to short and to the point:

I like you.

Just One Little Thing
Like me most, please.

I say all that, to show you this one:

Wouldn't It Be Better?
You are still, to this day, the only man who has made me physically weak just by making eye contact. It is probably a good thing we never slept together.



...and yikes.

photo via Flickr

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Surprise Wedding Reception!!

Wow. This story is SO fabulous!

Ok, Improv Everywhere is a group out of NYC that organizes pranks and funny group activities that require the "agents," or participants to "improv" what they would do in the situation to make everything go like it should.

My favorites that they do are the Mp3 Experiments where everyone who wants to participate downloads an mp3 from their website and puts it on their iPod or whatever, does NOT listen to it, and at a predetermined time and place, pushes play and follows the instructions. The results are brilliant.

The one from today is a Surprise Wedding Reception where the IE people chose a couple getting married at the City Clerk's office and gave them a reception in the middle of New York City. Aside from the couple and the immediate family that was there with them, the whole reception- planner, waiters and everything- were total strangers. Genius.

Monday, June 1, 2009

Wicked cool song

The lyrics are neither nor there, but the vibe of this song is way cool. Kinda hot if you ask me...

Boy With A Coin - Iron & Wine

Thanks to Rümmi's brother for the Iron & Wine