Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Still Alive

This is from one of the coolest games I have ever played, Portal. It's a puzzle game where you shoot a gun that makes a portal in the wal--

um...


Just read the article. It's sort of... involved. Anyhow, when you beat the game (which is SO funny and cool), it plays this song. The song is really cute sounding, but it ties into the game too, and it's so... sigh. I love video games.


Still Alive - Portal AI




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...I feel fantastic and I'm
still alive.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Come Pick Me Up

I'm not going to lie, I have no idea what this song is about, but it sounds like my day today- tired, a little frustrated, melancholy, ambivalent and lazy. I can't stop listening to it...





Come Pick Me Up - Ryan Adams


When they call your name
Will you walk right up
With a smile on your face
Or will you cower in fear
In your favorite sweater
With an old love letter

I wish you would
I wish you would
Come pick me up
Take me out
Fuck me up
Steal my records
Screw all my friends
They're all full of shit
With a smile on your face
And then do it again
I wish you would

When you're walking downtown
Do you wish I was there
Do you wish it was me
With the windows clear and the mannequins eyes
Do they all look like mine

You know you could
I wish you would
Come pick me up
Take me out
Fuck me up
Steal my records
Screw all my friends behind my back
With a smile on your face
And then do it again
I wish you would

I wish you'd make up my bed
So I could make up my mind
Try it for sleeping instead
Maybe you'll rest sometime
I wish I could


It sounds like slow dancing with a cowboy,

and that ain't never a bad thing.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Easter Candy, or Why New Year's Resolutions to Lose Weight Frequently Don't Succeed

- Ok, I'm going to go ahead and say upfront that this should probably be two different blogs, but one dovetails so nicely into the next that I'm going to leave it. -

I had an epiphany the other day, and it has made me wonder how anyone in the history of ever has kept a New Year's Resolution to lose weight for more than two or three months.

Everybody knows that in January, right after New Year's with its resolutions, the gyms are all packed and most of America goes on some kind of diet. We're all fat, we all wish we weren't, so with a new year comes fresh convictions and optimistic changes and hopes that we can change ourselves for the better. Well, through both personal experience and observation, I can tell you with relative certainty why people don't/can't/won't stay on a diet for very long after the new year.

Easter.

Shocking, right? Think about this: in January, your diet/exercise plan is both new and novel and you are all excited and maybe even getting some results. Then, BAM! Valentine's Day. Now, if you're single, you might be able to avoid the Valentine candy. But no sooner has that passed than EASTER hits you. And Easter is different; Easter is special. When you really get down to it, there are really four big candy related holidays: Valentine's Day, Easter, Halloween and Christmas. But of all of them, Easter has the most decadent and tempting (irony given the holiday's meaning?) seasonally specific candy. Sure, Valentine's day has conversation hearts and Halloween has candy corn.... but Easter. Who can resist Robin's Eggs? Or.... Cadbury Creme Eggs...... It's a dieting person's nightmare!! Just when you're really getting used to not eating crap (read: tasty, fattening food) all the time is when the absolute most delicious and bad-for-you treat rears its sugary, chocolatey head. And like I said, it's seasonally specific!! You can't even GET Cadbury Creme Eggs any other time of the year, so I, for one, feel like I'm wasting a delicious opportunity by NOT eating one some of them.


I realize that this is getting lengthy (that's what she said), but I have a related topic I must send into the blog-o-whatever. My Caleb friend and I were discussing this very thing last night, but it was within a larger discussion of the differences between men and women. Yeah, yeah, this can go on forever, but it started with me mentioning a girl we both know and how I thought she was absolutely gorgeous. He said that he didn't think she was all that pretty. I, being an avid reader of Smitten blogs, I said that our mutual friend must just be "girl pretty." He, reasonably, had never heard the term, so I explained it with regard to our friend: "She's a girl that girls want to look like, not necessarily a girl that guys find attractive." I supplied a couple more examples of friends we have that I would absolutely kill to look like, but he reiterated that they weren't really what he would consider super attractive. I asked him if there were any dudes that he would want to look like, and he told me that he's never really thought about it. I understand that he's a dude, and dudes don't typically think about their looks in that way, but the interesting thing is that he didn't know how much I, as a girl, thought about it. Let me just let all of the boys in the world in on a secret: Women think about that all the time. Who they'd rather look like. I have an extensive mental list of women- actresses, musicians, friends- that I would love to look like, or at least approach looking like. Most of them are just skinnier than me, but others have good hair or pretty teeth or blue eyes or whatever other trait that I envy to a certain degree. Women are just like that (truly Così fan tutte! Ha ha... opera humor.... ::ahem::).

Anyway, I feel like this could be a contributing factor as to why women are "crazy" or whatever other stereotype you can think of. I mean, it's probably helping with why I'M any bit of crazy. When I say that I compare myself to other women, I mean, every single day, all day, many, many times. When I'm watching TV, or at my crappy retail job at the mall, or at the frickin' grocery store... doesn't matter. I will say this, though- the time it happens the worst, the most consistently? When I eat. Day to day, I can tell you without much thought exactly what I have eaten, what I consider "cheat" food, what I'm planning on eating later and if I have any snacky food at home to facilitate more "cheat" eating later. When I told this to Caleb, he was surprised and just couldn't fathom comparing himself to other dudes like that, or monitoring his food intake with borderline obsession. I'm an emotional eater, too, though, and that doesn't help. THAT'S a whole 'nother blog, though....

This sort of reminds me of a while back, when we were at rehearsal. Our director was telling us that no one knows how beautiful they truly are. "Women, especially. They are always comparing themselves to other women and judging themselves to ridiculous standards. Something else, they're always jealous of each other's hair." At this point, I indicated a friend of mine whose hair is always SO cute and at the same moment she goes, "Yeah, like Courtney." The fact that we proved his point was kind of forgotten as we both just died laughing.

So what does all of this mean? I don't know. Aside from the fact that I need to quit eating so much damn Easter candy, it is just something to think about.

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Sunday, March 7, 2010

Today is here!

Well, it's time, ladies and gentlemen. Time for the big, bad, final graduate recital. T-minus 3 hours until I need to be at the school setting up the crap for the live stream of the recital I'm hoping against hope works like it's supposed to. I am going to be very, very sad if it doesn't... but what can you do?


Ok, gotta go curl my hair... or eat a Cadbury Creme egg or something...

Friday, March 5, 2010

Recital Time!

So, for all of you wanting to watch this crazy recital thing, go here Sunday, March 7th, 2010 at 6pm CST. HOPEFULLY (crosses fingers) it will work as planned, though I can't be sure simply because technology sometimes hates me.

Also, I occasionally hear songs that are exactly perfect for a situation... then I hear another song that is also perfect for the same situation. Isn't funny how that works?



but then...




So yeah. That's kind of how I've been feeling lately: completely pulled in two directions. We'll just have to see how it goes, eh?


Hope you can tune in to the recital!! :D

Thursday, February 18, 2010

My last paper EVER!

So, as is my tendency, my LAST PAPER I EVER HAVE TO WRITE EVER is due tomorrow.... and I'm up right now finishing it. I will also likely not sleep this evening, but again... LAST PAPER EVER. I am feeling at least sort of okay about it as I can hand in a piece of crap tomorrow as long as I hand in something. I'll have to revise the heck out of it anyway because that's just what you do with these things.

In a slight bit of interestingness, I'm going to try to finagle a way to live stream my recital to here and also my fancy professional website so you loverly people can sit in your jammies on March 7th at 6pm CST and listen to some big ol' opera.

Okay, well I just needed a little mental break from editing and editing again and writing... so back to the grind.


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Sunday, February 14, 2010

Terrifyingest

This was on Post Secret today. Eegads.

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For real.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Ads

I'm sure everyone is going to be posting about the Superbowl today, and I am no different. I just want to share the cutest ad ever. I saw it before the Superbowl, and loved it then, so here it is for your viewing pleasure:






CUTEST. I may or may not have gotten choked up the first time I saw it...... (of course I did)